Wednesday, October 19, 2011

When I grow up

Like so many of the best conversations, this one happened today in the car.

Mo: I'm going to have a lot of kids when I grow up.

Me:  Oh yeah.

Mo: Yeah. I'm going to have a van. And I'm going to have as many kids as there are seats in the van.

Me: Why do you want so many kids?

Mo: So I can put them in time out!

Curly: When I grow up, I'm driving a car.

Me: Great.

Curly: And I'm going to lock the windows on you, Mom!


(Curly can reach the window controllers from his car seat with his feet. He's infamous for opening and shutting them on really cold days, so I mostly keep the power windows locked.)

Monday, October 3, 2011

Recent gems from Mo

We're out for dinner. The server asks for our drink orders. Mo looks her in the eye, "Well, I always like beer."

One afternoon shortly after starting first grade: "Mom, they have these cool puzzles at school. They're kind of complicated and have a lot of pieces. They're called chainsaw puzzles."

I babysit a neighbor kid after school. He and Mo constantly fight for my attention, and Mo started accusing me of liking the other kid better. That night before bed I explained to Mo that I'll always love Curly and him the best, because they're MY kids.

So the next day he tells the neighbor kid: "My Mom's really nice to you, but she actually likes me better. She told me. Why don't you ask her? Mom, don't you like me WAY better than him?"

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Curly's Halloween costume

I'm a sucker for group Halloween costumes. Must have started the year my college roommates and I dressed as KISS. We looked awesome.

Last year Curly and Mo masqueraded as Mario and Luigi. It was a hoot.

This year - after watching the movie and seeing a live performance of The Wizard of Oz - I thought PERFECT.

I can be Dorothy. Dad wants to be the Scarecrow. Mo loves robots and gladly offered to dress up as the Tin Man.

So Curly can be the Cowardly Lion. Right? Wouldn't that be adorable?

Well, Curly doesn't think so.

How about Toto? Or a munchkin? Perhaps the Wizard himself.

Nope. Nada. No way, silly Mama.

What does Curly want to be for Halloween? Sticking with the Wizard of Oz theme, of course...

Curly wants to be the tornado. Yep, the tornado.

Good thing we have a few weeks here. Any creative types out there, don't be shy. I could use some ideas, people.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Eight days with Mo and a two-wheel bike

Day 1: After a week of riding his new scooter, Mo decides to jump on his two-wheeler bike -- sans training wheels. He takes off, down hills, around corners, an instant professional.

That whole business with mom or dad running behind and holding the seat? Guess we missed out.

Day 2: Mo begs to start riding his bike as soon as he wakes at 6:30 a.m. He spends as much time as humanly possible on the little bike -- stopping only begrudgingly to eat and use the bathroom.

Day 3: I take Mo and a buddy to the park on their bikes. I learn that running behind them with a stroller isn't gonna cut it. When he's on a bike, I need to be on a bike or get left in the dust.

After this one-mile ride, Mo begs for a longer excursion.

Day 5: We plan to take Mo a couple miles down the bike path and back -- but he insists we keep going and going. Our bike path is a loop around a lake, so after about six miles we commit to going the whole way.

Mo rides his little two-wheeler for 16 miles, only stopping once to play at a park. Took about two hours total.

Day 6: Mo complains about "fizzy wrists" from his long ride the previous day. I buy him biking gloves.

Mo starts riding one-handed.

He also gets out a rope, with the brilliant idea to tow Curly behind him on the tricycle. Yeah, I don't think so.

Day 7: I decide to sign up Mo (and Dad and I, Curly in the trailer) for his first official bike ride, a breast cancer fundraiser. 10 miles. Should be a breeze.

He also ignores my warnings, convinced he's seasoned enough to ride off curbs. He also tries riding no-handed. (I ride no-handed a lot. Great example there Mom.)

Day 8: Mo learns the meaning of road rash. He takes a hill way too fast, misses the tight curve, flips over the handle bars.

Surface level damage only, no broken bones. Yet.

Any ideas what he might try tomorrow?

Friday, August 26, 2011

Six

Mo turned six this week, and he starts first grade on Sept. 1.

So what's he up to these days?

He wore polka dot socks and flip flops an entire day last week. He requested a fondue restaurant for his birthday party. And his favorite song is "The Sweater Song" by Weezer.

He's smart and sassy as ever.

For example. The kid's got a mouth on him. I try to stop the "naughty" words (stupid, shut-up, hate, dumb, fat butt, chainsaw-your-head-off) but they just keep a-comin. A friend has been denying her kids the next snack each time they say a bad word. I explained this to Mo. He thought about it quite seriously and then replied: "OK I get it. I can only say bad words when I'm not hungry."

To get to know him better, his first grade teacher sent home a little questionnaire. When asked to name three things he's good at, Mo answers: "Napping. Underwater handstands. And eating popcorn."

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Sassy doesn't stop for summer

Mo is especially gifted with it comes to loud, gassy noises. In summer school last week, he belched loud enough to stop his teacher mid-lesson.

I guess she then asked him, "What was that for?"

And he replied, "Well, Ms. T, that was just for you!"

At least that's how he recounted the story. He emphasized that she laughed, and Mo was very proud that his teacher thinks he's funny. I'm not sure if he said "Excuse me" during the exchange, but a mother can hope.



On a totally separate note, Curly's convinced that basketball is actually called "bounce-a-ball." If you try to tell him any differently, he will insist that you are wrong.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Flashback Friday: Making everyone happy

I'm feeling a little nostalgic now that Curly's (almost, almost) potty trained and rarely takes naps anymore.

Got to thinking about how I used to handle those frustrating times when I'd finally get Curly down and then Mo would wake him up -- and then he'd do it again, and again. Nothing like wasting two hours of your day just trying to get your kid to nap.

Eventually I got creative so that we all ended up with what we wanted.

I'd pack us all in the car -- giving Curly his blankie and a bottle. I'd bribe Mo to stay totally quiet, and as soon as Curly feel asleep we'd pull into the nearest McDonalds drive thru. I'd get coffee and he'd get a lemonade or yogurt parfait. Then I'd find a nice construction site and park.

Mo was then allowed to sit next to me in the passenger seat. He'd eat his yogurt and watch the diggers and dump trucks. I'd turn on my book-on-CD and sip my coffee.

And everybody was happy.